Wildlife of Hell Bent #6: The Fashion-Conscious Magi-sassin

Posted: February 12, 2017 in Uncategorized

Hello, and welcome to this episode of Wildlife of Hell Bent with Dr. Serena Taylor. Today, we study the habits of the Fashion-Conscious Magi-sassin. She is known for being a lethal clotheshorse and the twin sister of the Vodka-Soaked Telepathic Assassin.

Yvette jumped in surprise as she looked up from her sewing.

“Serena! How did you get in here?!”

Your sister let me in, of course. So, as we can see, the specimen is hard at work on one of those things she does best. The Fashion-Conscious Magi-sassin is particularly adept at creating clothing. Not only for herself, but for those around her. In fact, she singlehandedly comprises the wardrobe department for the show.”

Yvette blushed a bit at the unexpected shout-out, smiling somewhat.

“Well, you know…clothing is just one of those things I’m especially passionate about. And shoes? Oh, don’t get me started on those…!”

Yes, she has been known to hoard shoes…the fact that she uses magic is probably the only reason they don’t create as much clutter as one might expect.

Yvette giggled. “I’ll sometimes leave a bunch of them out on purpose, though. Just to mess with Ivy.”


The fashionista thought about that one. “…Wait. YOU’RE the reason my new shirt almost didn’t go with itself?! I should’ve known!”

…Right. Anyhow, the Fashion-Conscious Magi-sassin is also known for using magic. Sometimes it is in a defensive manner. Sometimes it can be used to track things or fix stuff. And sometimes…

Yvette sent a blast of magical energy off-screen with an enraged shout, smirking as it was followed by a surprised yelp.

Sometimes, it can be used to attack. Like when one finds that their younger sister has been messing with their stuff.

“That the best you got, ‘Vette?! I’ll kick your ass from here to next month!”

“I’d like to see you try it, Ives!”

With that, both twins were soon on-camera, duking it out with each other.

Ooh! It seems that there is an intense bit of sibling rivalry between these two creatures. Note that the Fashion-Conscious Magi-sassin seems fond of hair-pulling, whereas the Vodka-Soaked Telepathic Assassin is a bit more prone to using her elbows in an offensive manner. By this point, notice how the North American Ginger Chatty-Monkey and Pint-Sized Large-Breasted Robo-Kitty emerge onto the scene to see what all the commotion is. The Pint-Sized Large-Breasted Robo-Kitty begins to pull away the Fashion-Conscious Magi-sassin, her own strength much greater than that the subject of today’s documentary. As for the Vodka-Soaked Telepathic Assassin, she appears to be distracted by the sight of the North American Ginger Chatty-Monkey yanking off his shirt and whipping it around his head not unlike the blade of a helicopter. She tries to get back to fighting her sister, but keeps coming back to the sight of her mate’s exposed torso. He adds in a little pout and a sad look in his large green eyes. And with that, their fight is brought to an end for now.

“Yvette, we’ve been through this. You two don’t need to beat the shit out of each other,” Beast sighed. “Save that for when we’re on the job, alright?”

The twins nodded, but both looked disappointed that they couldn’t complete the fight. Ivy put an arm around Travis’ waist, soon leading him off somewhere that she could take out that residual frustration in a more…fun way, one could say.

Right. So…this creature works as an assassin, along with her sister and their friend. Who happens to be my own sister. And I do believe that’s all the time we have today. Join us next time as we speak to a special, secret guest! Even I don’t know who it’ll be!


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