Wildlife of Hell Bent #3

Posted: January 22, 2017 in Uncategorized

Hello again, and welcome to the newest installment of Wildlife of Hell Bent, with Dr. Serena Taylor! Join us today as we discuss the habits of the Pint-Sized Large-Breasted Robo-Kitty!

At this point, there was a musical fanfare of some sort…one could suppose. In reality, Serena had taken over for her “graphics department” and created her own intro for the videos of her catnip-addled exploits. The fanfare for the intro was her attempt at imitating a brass instrument. It was…

It was nowhere near as good as she thought it was. It may have been an excellent imitation of a dying moose, but a majestic brass section… Nope. And it played over footage of her interviewing her son (much to his annoyance) and her son-in-law (visibly pinching the bridge of his nose in exasperation the whole time). The montage of footage ended with her sliding in front of the camera and doing jazz hands.

Clearly, she needed to find a new graphics department, because the replacement she’d had for the alleged previous one had no idea what she was doing.

Once her credits sequence had concluded, Serena strode through the lab that she called home. As she walked, she could hear a voice singing in the distance. The voice was coming from the bathroom, she realized. And she had a decision to make as to if she should interrupt her sister’s bath or wait.


Dammit, she had a time limit she was working with, and would not be forced to wait! She casually opened the door, and singing gave way to enraged screaming.


Here we have today’s subject: the Pint-Sized Large-Breasted Robo-Kitty. You may have noticed that I bear some resemblance to her. You see, that is because we are twins.

“…You’re hopped up on nip again, aren’t you?” the subject, better known as Beast, sighed.


“And you didn’t think to bring ME any?!”

I…I seem to have finished it.

“You suuuuuuck…”

My apologies. Anyhow, the first thing one might notice about today’s specimen would be the imposing metal arms and legs. Weighing in at 50 pounds per limb, one might think that these would slow this creature down. And yet somehow, they do not. A testament, perhaps, to my own brilliance.

“Brilliance…like the kind that causes you to interrupt your sister’s bath?” Beast snorted.

Yes. Of course, the limbs themselves are not the only enhanced part of her. Beneath the skin, she has had her skeleton reinforced, if not outright replaced. The muscles and ligaments are also part of the well-oiled machine that is her body, at this point. The internal organs and skin, however, are still 100% organic. As for one particular part of this creature’s traits…yes, those are natural, as well.

Beast’s ears flattened and her cheeks flushed, as Serena went over the particulars of her body. She was proud of her appearance, for sure. But her sister was making her immensely uncomfortable.

“Serena, I will give you five seconds to clear outta this room and at least let me get dressed before you continue. Remember what I do for a living?”

Serena did remember all too well and turned the camera toward herself.

We’ll be back.

Serena left the room, closing the door behind her. And then she turned the camera to herself again.

The occupation of the Pint-Sized Large-Breasted Robo-Kitty is that of an assassin. Her limbs are built to inflict devastation upon her targets. The right hand ends with claws as opposed to fingers, and each limb itself can be utilized for blunt force trauma purposes. It may make stealth a difficult endeavor, but she is otherwise a killing machine.

Soon enough, Beast emerged from the room, having dried herself off and pulled on a short, low-cut dress.

We notice that this specimen wears clothing that lacks sleeves or legs. Unless the sleeves in question are wide and flowing, wearing those becomes difficult for her. As we also see, she is not very tall at all. Hence the pint-sized part of her moniker.

Beast ran the large metal fingers of her left hand through her long dark hair, before adjusting the patch over her right eye just a little. She let out a yawn, before her fluffy black tail swayed slightly.

As one can easily surmise, the Pint-Sized Large-Breasted Robo-Kitty is…well, part feline. The ears and tail are completely real. Observe.

As Serena reached for Beast’s tail, the assassin jerked away and hissed at her.

The specimen appears testy.

“Damn right, the specimen appears testy…you just tried to yank my tail! Do you have any idea how much that hurts?!”

I doubt that it is that bad.

Beast grinned madly and reached for her sister’s tail. She got a solid metallic grip on it and gave it a good yank. Serena tried to hold back a shout, but was unsuccessful. Beast smirked in response.

The specimen has been known to become aggressive and cruel, and just a HUGE BITCH!

“Hey, you’re the one that wanted to pull my tail first. I just wanted to demonstrate something, sis. Are we done now?”

NEVER! The Pint-Sized Large-Breasted Robo-Kitty feels superior enough to viciously attack a well-respected nature documentarian, and I will not stand for it! I swear, if I could make a small, highly-localized EMP device…

Beast turned on her and growled, ears flattening again. She was not about to stand for this nonsense…! And if that was meant to be a threat, she was going to go on a lab equipment wrecking spree.

“Serena, you might do well to cut this episode a bit short…” Beast muttered.

Why is that?

“Because sometimes? Sometimes, the subjects of nature documentaries chase those that invaded their space with a camera.”

Serena took a moment to think about it, before her eyes went wide with realization. And with that, she began to run as fast as she could in pumps. Which was actually quite fast. It helped that she had a cyborg chasing her, the steel of her feet pounding the ground the whole time. But did she stop filming?


As we can see here, the Pint-Sized Large-Breasted Robo-Kitty can track her targets with an impressive display of speed! And intimidation! And Beast, I think you just put a crack in my floor!


The pair ran from the lab, soon taking to the walkway. Serena scanned the area for a good hiding place, soon going to scramble up the nearest tree.

An interesting fact…but *pant* the specimen can’t *panting, wheezing* climb trees, due to the sheer bulk of her limbs!

“No, but I bet I can cut one down with my claws! You made ‘em really well, to your credit!”

CRAP! So…that concludes this week’s episode of Wildlife of Hell Bent! Join us next week, when we study the habits of the Pacifistic Ginger Yoga Monkey!

Satisfied that she had intimidated Serena effectively, Beast whirled around and strutted inside, giving an exaggerated swing of her hips along the way. Serena glared after her. She WOULD get her revenge…

But that would wait for another day, as she fell out of the tree with a yelp. The scientist got off of the ground and dusted herself off. Only a few minor scrapes.


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